I love reading all the books related to introversion for the past days, especially after being mistakenly thought of as weird all my life or mentally handicapped, snobby or seriously mentally ill (which are all things people have thought of me throughout my life). It is such a relief to know that is just how my brain works, that there is a perfectly good reason behind it and it does not make me some kind of freak or in need of pharmaceutical assistance.
I just realize being an introvert (and it explains so much), I cannot stand noises I can't control. I notice in many ways. When I go to the public spaces, that if so many people there, everything seems so fast and loud, it just sends me that I have to leave the area. If I insist to be there, it drains me so much quicker, like a feeling of after running 6 laps. I just hate it. Tired.
Another example when my neighbors are noisy, I actually feel as though I have to move. If I go to the restaurant and the table nearby is talking so loud, I can hardly focus on anything but that. Another annoying cases for me are when children were yelling and crying out loud (tantrum) or someone was angry, yelling out loud and speaking so loud, I just want to cry. I really do. I can't stand it. I am going to try now and just accept it and realize there is nothing I can do about it so please relax but I can't. I still can't stand hearing loud noises from TV every night. I don't like extremely loud music and the worst thing is if you find yourself in a packed restaurant and shopping center, and everyone is talking making a lot of noise.
I always carry earplugs in my purse, because if I go to somewhere, I can't tolerate the sound level they seem to consider standard. I prefer silence to sound when I am working, and whenever I am more solitude-deprived I find I am also much less tolerant of noisy gatherings of people. Some weeks when I have had several meetings with others, I practically run away from them, I just get the point that I can't accept anymore input from anyone.
Due to my overwhelmed feeling of noises, I think I could never live in a city, due to the noise. I love living in the suburb where everything goes quiet at ten in the evening. Several weeks ago I slept with too many noises out there and realized that I had been living with a noisy neighbor and I wondered why I slept poorly.
What I can do now is just making myself secured by avoiding those noisy areas. I don't even listen others' talking and I have ability to shut my ears and don't take any word from them.
People are just different and I have to learn good, healthy way to work out our differences. I think I have to plan on learning how to do it a lot more with others in the future.
Picture is taken from here.
Credit to the owner! Thanks.
