Wednesday, March 27, 2013

Which one to follow: Brain or Heart?

I saw a friend's tweet "Should I follow what my brain says or my heart says?". In a sudden I realise that sometimes our head tells us one thing and our heart says another, which is the one you listen to? When it comes to relationships, both play an important role. I got a very good reference from psychology journals about what you should listen. I picked several parts that attract me most.

FOLLOW YOUR HEAD

  • When you're thinking of cheating. If you have a wandering eye and are considering acting on it, put your emotions on hold and think about what you're about to do. Cheating can have serious consequences in the relationship so think long and hard about what you might be risking and or who you might hurt. Don't let attraction or emotions rule our actions.
  • When you're attracted to someone off-limits. Maybe you're attracted to your best friend's ex or someone else that you know you shouldn't pursue. Don't let the emotions cloud your judgment when it means that you're risking your friendship or another important relationship. Think about what acting on your attraction would mean for your friendship instead of acting impulsively and following your heart.
  • When they treat you badly. I experienced it once before and I know I was not wise enough to think clearly. Don't listen to our emotions when we're in a bad relationship. It's hard I know but once you break it, it's so relieving because our emotional side will make excuses for their bad behavior and get sentimental about their good qualities. Instead, we need to use our head and look at the cold hard facts if they treat us badly. It doesn't matter how many good times you have had together. Sorry, I know it's too bad yet blatant.

FOLLOW YOUR HEART
  • When deciding who to be with. Forget what your head is telling you about whether or not someone is your usual type, or if your friends will approve. We can't help whom we're attracted to and if there's someone that we just really want to be with, listen to our heart and go for it. 
  • When committing. If your heart tells you that you've struck relationship gold and you simply just want to be together, listen to your heart when deciding if you want to commit to someone. Don't start weighing the pros and cons in your head and thinking about all of the reasons why you should keep your options open. If we're really into someone and they feel the same, follow our heart and commit to them. 
  • When it comes to long distance. There are a million reasons not to try a long distance relationship and it's easy to talk yourself out of it. But sometimes it's just the right person and we want to be together and make it work, no matter the distance. Listen to our heart to determine if they're the one and we are willing to stay together even with a bit of distance between us.
  • When saying "I Love You". Don't let our head rule this one because it will surely talk you out of it. Expressing love to someone is purely emotional. If you think about it too much you'll likely be scared off by the risks. Take the leap and follow our heart if we want to reap the rewards of telling our partner that we love them. 

Sometimes judging which one to follow is quite tricky. Heck, give it a shot.