Bouncing Back

We live in a society where a high value is placed on being positive. Sometimes, this simply is not possible because people find themselves facing temporary or long-term sadness. So many sources telling yourself to "be positive" does not much help, because moods can have a life of their own.

One of the pitfalls of positivity is that people tend to fantasize about a perfect life instead of realistically facing the fact that no life is perfect. Everyone's existence contains challenges, disappointments, frustration and failed expectations.

Further, what usually happens is that most of us become passive. We distract ourselves by watching more television or spending more hours on the computer. We wait for sadness to pass and we behave as if nothing bad is going on. Keeping up a good front is important in most people's lives, yet behind the facade can lurk a good deal of fear.

Instead of positivity, I think what is needed is reality. Being realistic means that you drop the main defense that all of us are tempted to employ - denial. The only reason to deny your sadness is if you feel that you can't do anything about it. It is perfectly normal to have sadness in your life. Some kinds, however, can be a cause for concern. If you are feeling sad at this moment, or have been experiencing a down mood for a while, look honestly at your situation.

Developing emotional resilience is perhaps the most important, because that is the ability to bounce back from the sadness. You have to encourage it by being present with you feelings instead of fearing them, by focusing on the times you have survived and thrived in the face of tough circumstances and by appreciating and rewarding yourself for dealing with your difficulties. Sadness comes and goes, working it on long-term to get emotionally mature happiness is the best way to insulate ourselves from downswings in our mood.

.. and it takes time and silence.

So, it is better to stay in silence for awhile to build your well-being and get yourself and mind back in one piece.

Hey, Back Here!

Hi folks, hope you are doing well. It is 6 am in the morning and I am at the office right now. No, not for working, I want to spend a little time writing on my personal blog. I was so busy lately and I couldn't get any inspiration to write at all. However, based on my own experiences these past few weeks, I want to share about a common habit that can create a lot of misery, and sadly I was dragged to its level:

To not be where you are.

It means, your body is right here, but your thoughts are elsewhere in universe. They are in the past, somewhere between old memories or even replaying an argument that you still want to win for the hundredth time. Or in the possible future. Worried and stressed about what may happen at work, trying to plan for every possible scenario and through that hoping to fully control the future.

By spending the time to think about the past and the possible future, the more you - in my personal experience - tend to also be ineffective and miss life as it happens.

Overthinking zaps so much of your energy that you can lose motivation to take action. Additionally, if you are not fully here in this moment then it is very easy to miss and to not fully enjoy a victory or simply a beautiful, fun or small moment in life.

Of course, you cannot spend all of your time in the now because there are things you can learn from reexamining your past and there are things you sometimes need to plan for you in the future. But the kind of obsessive or addictive way to spend so much time in a regular week in the past of future can be replaced with something smarter and happiness friendly.

There are habits that helped me a lot in the past few weeks to make that shift. First, slow down. Start your day with doing whatever you do first in your morning slowly. This will help you to keep in slower pace and to focus fully on what you are doing for the rest of your morning. Do everything in calm and relaxed manner is often the quickest way to do something well. So you can get your mind back to what your body is doing.

Second, reminding yourself silently: Now I am....

And it could be that "I am brushing my teeth, taking a walk and listening to the sounds around me, etc. Just reminding your self to stop wandering and it brings your focus back.

Third, disrupt your thoughts and quickly reconnect with here and now. If you are dragged into much negativity, overthinking, use a stop-word or phrase to silence the inner critic. This works well. Just shout in your mind: STOP.

So hopefully it helps you to run your days ahead.

Take care :)

Events That Change Your Personality

We are raised with different environments and for the most part, it affects our personality development. We tend to stay true to them throughout our lives. So many aspects and significant events build our personality and some of them can have such a big impact on us that they can change our personalities.

Here are some major events that can change a person's personality, the way they think, and the way they see the world, for better or for worse:

Overcoming major difficulties
We hear the stories of how people overcome a major illness, endure a traumatic event and make major major changes to the way they live their lives. Being faced with such hard things can shake us to the very core and gives people a mind-altering experience. When people are given second chance, they usually come out with makeover in their personalities.  

Money and Power
Sometimes for the better, but often for worse, money and power have the ability to change people. People often undergo many emotional and personal changes when they inherit a large amount of money and being granted a power. Money often brings out the worst in people, though for some people, money can make people to let out all of the negativity and just to enjoy their newfound wealth, especially if they choose to share it others less fortunate. Same condition when people have power. Having a taste of power when you previously did not have any can prompt people to want more and more and make people forget of the good kind of value.

Success
Power is achieved when someone put their hard work and dedication to their goals, it can have more of positive effects. When someone succeeds, especially at a high level, it has the ability to change who they are. People who used to be lacked confidence can become inspirational and visionary.

Getting hurt
Getting hurt, or shut down, can take a toll on a person, and have a negative effect on their personality. someone who was joyous and free spirited can get beaten down to the point where they become pessimistic. Feeling of getting hurt can make someone feels so hopeless and without a huge turning point, they can be forever in mourning.

Toxic people
Spending time with toxic people can also take a toll on a person's personality. They just simply have bad influence to our lives, particularly if they make us feel ashamed or embarrassed about the way we are. If they mock us down, our personality can change over time to become more like them and less like our true selves.

So, it is needed a true strength of ourselves to cope with our own personality and it is truly our choice how we want to be perceived by others, to be good, or to be bad.

Good luck.

How to cope with your loneliness

Loneliness is a choice and sometimes we cannot avoid it. We just surrender to the condition and accept that we're so lonely even in the crowd. It seems that your best friends cannot fill that gap. It seems your girlfriend/boyfriend cannot make you complete. But, we need to realise being lonely is so human.

Perhaps you just broke up with your loved ones or you're running long distance relationship. After all, it is still a negative feeling, of being lonely. Here comes the ideas to cope with your loneliness that I hope it works on you.

Remember that we all feel lonely at times, not only you, but many out there. 
It is something normal, and you cannot let yourself dragged into more sorrow and sadness.

Find something you enjoy and that interest you. 
Being absorbed in your passion, hobby that can change the way you feel or simply put your attention to your work, but not being a workaholic.

Don't think that sex will help to fill the emptiness. 
If you're single and simply plain lonely or you're running LDR, it applies for you. It won't bring lasting meaning or fulfillment to your life. In fact, you're likely to feel lonelier and more dissatisfied. I never experience it personally, something like booty-call or so. I just know the term booty-call few weeks ago. Pardon. If you're with your partner, it's your choice to have sex. What I mean is, don't have sex with the one who's not your partner just because you feel lonely.

Even if you're in a happy, and strong relationship, you cannot expect your partner to meet your every need. 
We still need other friends and other things that we can do. You can still meet with your friends. She/He can do that to. Loosen up and trust them, they'll pay you with greater love and affection.

Make sure you're not living in some kind of fantasy.
You think too much of being Bella Swan or you're too much falling in love with Ryan Gosling (okay, that's me but it's just admiration, not a huge fan). You're longing for a love life like in the movie. It is an imaginary world that can never satisfy. Live your real world and work on real relationship.

Don't wait for other people to phone or contact you. 
Call your friends or arrange something to meet up with your friends.

Don't turn to drugs or alcohol to block out how you feel. 
That's a temporary solution and won't help in the end. You just devastate your own self. Heck, who wants to be with alcoholic and a drug user?

If you're afraid of getting close as you've been hurt in the past consider getting counselling or psychotherapy. 
Believe me, you can heal your scar and you can learn to trust again.

Good luck :)

Healthy mind, body and soul

For the past year, I felt so unhealthy with all the errands and so many excuses following behind for a simple reason like working out. I did not have any motivation to run again, just because I was too tired with school stuff and other activities. But, what is the good point if you only have healthy mind but your body does not share the same thought.

I have been working out every morning for the past three weeks, my body hurts because it's been ages since the last time I ran. But I already get the result, my body is fresher and more energised. Though I don't sweat for pounds, I seek for good health and firm body. So, here are the motivation that hopefully can help you to always still be fit. 

• Weight won't lift themselves. 
• Amazing body is not a miracle, you have to earn it.
• Get started right now, spend your first 15 minutes and escalate it each day.
• No more excuses, think of sexy girls out there. You can have it too.
• Yourself is your inspiration.
• Be committed.
• Sweat is fat crying. 
• Make exercise your natural drugs. Be addicted. 

This is my morning routine for the past weeks:

• Drink a lot of mineral water, Omega 3 and multivitamin
• Inhale and exhale the fresh air
• Start working out 30 mins to 45 mins. I work on my legs, upper and lower arm, outer and inner thigh, abs, breast, and butt. You may google it for the moves and find the most suitable for you. 
• Pay attention to my diet. I eat a lot of veggies and fruits. Else, I eat normal with less portion. 
• Drink, drink, drink

Everything is possible. I did not drink mineral water as much as I do right now until my boyfriend complains about it. That is why I change my habit to be healthier. I can, you surely can do it too. 

Point to ponder, healthy body leads to positive thoughts and good mood!

Good luck :) 

... and wish me luck too!

How to escape the friend zone

I went reading my Twitter timeline and some of my friends told their drama on their statuses. Apparently, many of them are trapped in a situation that probably people common say it as friend zone.  Both men and women , of course, have experienced it. You know, when you stuck on your crush for such a long time, either your crush already put their heart for someone else or simply they don't notice you.

So, here are several tips that hopefully can help you to escape the friend zone (from my point of view, I am a woman but you can't generalise my opinion to all women out there)

You're no longer a shoulder to cry on.
The reason you're probably in the friend zone is because you've always been the shoulder for your crush to cry on. When his/her relationships sour, you're always there to pick them up again and offer relationship advice. Stop playing this role, kitties. Be a gentleman and a lady, you're not their doormat with a word "welcome".

Flirt.
If you're still in the friend zone then you're obviously not flirting effectively. You may be too subtle and he or she is not even noticing your will. So, step it up. You may hold their gaze a little longer than you normally would and compliment them to let them know that you think they look great.

Get physical.
It's not like what you think. It sounds scary but if you're too subtle, they don't know! Playfully tap his or her foot with your own. Take a small risk and place your hand on theirs or, if your crush is a female, you can place your hand on her back whilst you're both out at a bar. BUT, don't do this in the first date. We talk about friend zone, don't we? Then you should know each other for a quite time.

Get real dating.
The benefit of being in the friend zone is that you can hang out with them one-on-one without being weird. Bonus. You can make your crush enjoy spending the time with you and this atmosphere can make you realise how great you are with one another.

Earn respect.
There's nothing more attractive than a gentleman, have dignity for yourself, and treat her with all of the respect that she hopes from a partner. Offer her your jacket, be a real man that makes your crush thinks that she feels safe with you. Show her that you have manners and you respect her as a woman, not just as your "mate".

Don't ever. Ever. Ever. Breaking up the happy couple.
It's tricky. You may think to break up this happy couple if one of them is your crush. Don't do it. Envy is an unattractive quality in anyone, so don't let it be! Instead, try to show your crush that even they're in a relationship, they're still important to you. Hard, yes. TRY!

Let's compete!
A little healthy competition has never been bad for anyone. If someone feels as though they could lose something, it all of a sudden becomes more precious to them. You probably make your crush priority, but they've friend zoned you and made you an option. It's time to make new friends. If you begin spending more time with another person of the opposite sex, it's only natural that your crush may become a little jealous. But don't make them super jealous that will only destroy your friendship and any future chance of moving to love zone. Play this card very carefully, dahl.

Absence.
Absence makes the heart grown fonder. True. Your crush has got used to you always being there, and as a result, they take you for granted. It's only when we notice some distance between those we're close to that we begin to realise just how much their presence means to us.

Make over time!
You don't have to buy the latest fashion in order to make yourself more attractive to your crush. Your crush has probably friend zoned you because they've known you for a long time and they've become very used to who you are as a person. As a result, you may no longer seem exciting to them.
Think of hairstyle, natural yet pretty make up, good attitude. It's time for a fresh change! :)

Say it.
Maybe it's time to say your crush how you feel in the hope that they feel the same way back. Some women don't realise men's gesture whether they like us or not. I know you're freaking out about ruining your friendship, but this really is the last step if all else fails. It's better to risk some embarrassment for the chance of finally dating your love interest. But, I don't think it's a part of embarrassment, it's a part of honesty, people will respect your honesty about your own feeling. Feel the gut.

All fails.
You've tried everything, including telling your crush one but no success. It begins to hard, staying friends with someone who isn't romantically interested in you. By spending time with them constantly, you hurt yourself even more. It's wise to try to remain friends with them, but not to see them or talk to them as often as you usually do. Explain it your crush that you can't help your feelings and it's time for you to move on. It's time for you now to untie those heart strings and to start searching for someone just as attractive to you. There's plenty more fish in the sea, and you deserve to find true love, just like everyone else.

Good luck :)

How to boost your self esteem and love yourself more

Everybody is good-looking. Everybody is successful. Everybody has cuter girlfriend or boyfriend. Everybody has.. you name it. All the thoughts that put your self esteem down and prevent you to create and love your self more.

We know that we spend a lot of time focusing on our relationship with other people, both extroverts and introverts. But, we often neglect the relationship with ourselves. The way we see ourselves and our level of self esteem affects the way you see the world. I'm just trying to point it out several things that I do to re-boost my self esteem that I am so worth it in this world.

List of personal good traits
What things are you good at? What best qualities you, your friends and your partner like? You must be have the good things within. Write down everything you can think of. Keep your list and pull it out anytime you start feeling insecure or down on yourself.

Revisit your past accomplishments
What things have you done in the past that you're proud of? You might think you haven't accomplished anything, but when you think back, you have probably done way more than you realize.

Think of what you loved as a kid
What were your favorite things to do when you were a kid? Boost your self-esteem by revisiting the things that you used to love. Take up art again or start playing football again. Do the run because what we did as a kid were the things we did purely for fun.

Spend time with fun people
It could be your friends. It could be your love partner. Laugh is the best trick to boost your self-esteem, surround yourself with people who are easy going and fun. Avoid people who are negative because they will bring you down to their level. Fun people will build you up. It doesn't matter if you're an introvert and don't like to hang out. You can spend yourself to one or two that you are comfortable with. I usually spend my time a lot with my boyfriend and best friends. I feel so good because I choose positive things.

Say something positive to yourself each day
There is no perfect person in this world. Say something good to yourself, enough beat yourself up. You need a break. Make it a habit, like brushing your teeth and look in the mirror and compliment yourself that you're so fine and your life is full of blesses. Compliments aren't just for other people.

Banish negative self-talk
We have so many negative thoughts throughout the day that we probably don't even realize all of the nasty things we think about ourselves and others. We start to be insecure. Try to be more aware of your thoughts and stop yourself every time you start to beat yourself up in your mind. I am still facing this kind of negative thoughts because of my personal bad experience in the past. It makes me insecure and over-thinking towards everything. Once I feel that, I just try to breathe and tell myself that everything is okay and try to control my mind.

Set goals and reward yourself
One of the best ways to feel good about ourselves is to accomplish a goal. Set some goals for the short and long term and set out to achieve them. Have a reward in mind for when you reach them. For example, I just finished my school as my promise from the old time that I will get my master's degree at 25 years old and get decent job. What next? Divide your goals into several aspects e.g. life, love, career, etc. You will feel great about accomplishing what you set out to do and you get a treat out of it to make you feel even better about yourself.

Good luck :)

Which one to follow: Brain or Heart?

I saw a friend's tweet "Should I follow what my brain says or my heart says?". In a sudden I realise that sometimes our head tells us one thing and our heart says another, which is the one you listen to? When it comes to relationships, both play an important role. I got a very good reference from psychology journals about what you should listen. I picked several parts that attract me most.

FOLLOW YOUR HEAD

• When you're thinking of cheating. If you have a wandering eye and are considering acting on it, put your emotions on hold and think about what you're about to do. Cheating can have serious consequences in the relationship so think long and hard about what you might be risking and or who you might hurt. Don't let attraction or emotions rule our actions.
• When you're attracted to someone off-limits. Maybe you're attracted to your best friend's ex or someone else that you know you shouldn't pursue. Don't let the emotions cloud your judgment when it means that you're risking your friendship or another important relationship. Think about what acting on your attraction would mean for your friendship instead of acting impulsively and following your heart.
• When they treat you badly. I experienced it once before and I know I was not wise enough to think clearly. Don't listen to our emotions when we're in a bad relationship. It's hard I know but once you break it, it's so relieving because our emotional side will make excuses for their bad behavior and get sentimental about their good qualities. Instead, we need to use our head and look at the cold hard facts if they treat us badly. It doesn't matter how many good times you have had together. Sorry, I know it's too bad yet blatant.

FOLLOW YOUR HEART

• When deciding who to be with. Forget what your head is telling you about whether or not someone is your usual type, or if your friends will approve. We can't help whom we're attracted to and if there's someone that we just really want to be with, listen to our heart and go for it. 
• When committing. If your heart tells you that you've struck relationship gold and you simply just want to be together, listen to your heart when deciding if you want to commit to someone. Don't start weighing the pros and cons in your head and thinking about all of the reasons why you should keep your options open. If we're really into someone and they feel the same, follow our heart and commit to them. 
• When it comes to long distance. There are a million reasons not to try a long distance relationship and it's easy to talk yourself out of it. But sometimes it's just the right person and we want to be together and make it work, no matter the distance. Listen to our heart to determine if they're the one and we are willing to stay together even with a bit of distance between us.
• When saying "I Love You". Don't let our head rule this one because it will surely talk you out of it. Expressing love to someone is purely emotional. If you think about it too much you'll likely be scared off by the risks. Take the leap and follow our heart if we want to reap the rewards of telling our partner that we love them. 

Sometimes judging which one to follow is quite tricky. Heck, give it a shot.

Communication Gone Bad

You can experience it anytime, anywhere, with anyone.

Being defensive. This is when you perceive what the other person is saying as a real threat and you try to argue back their points. In reality, the other person is not trying to attack you. Instead of being defensive, try to see how their point is constructive for you and ask them clarifying questions like "How do you mean by that? What's your point?" You might be surprised that they have meant something else and you have over-reacted for no reason.

Stone walling. This is when you put up a wall and pretty much block out everything the other person says. Example of stone walling is when somebody tries to lecture you and you have the attitude of "Whatever, I don't care, I'm not listening, etc." This could be bad in communication especially in relationships when the other person has something important to say. Eventually, not addressing the issue at hand could lead to a fail relationship. Instead of stone walling, try your hardest to show that you're listening by making gentle eye contact, getting the other person to calm down, sit down and talk things through.

Being Sarcastic. There’s a time and place for this, but when you are sarcastic it sends off the message that what the other person say is not taken seriously. Furthermore, if the other person is expecting a straightforward and honest answer, and you try to be sarcastic, the other person may feel blocked out. Instead of being sarcastic, you could say exactly what the other person wants to hear. 

Using humor. This is similar to the problems with being sarcastic. There’s a time and place for humor, but certain situations require you be sensitive and tactful. 

Not showing that you’re listening through your body language. You may be listening, but sometimes you don’t really pay attention to your body language. Your body language has to communicate that you’re listening too. For example, making eye contact, facing the other person directly, leaning forward towards the person, open body posture (not crossing arms etc). 

Not being entirely honest. This is when you try to be deceitful, give half truths, or leave out important information. If you’re talking to someone, the main thing a person looks for a genuineness. Genuineness is develop when you have nothing to hide. Certainly, we can’t be genuine in all our relationships, but if you truly respect the other person, you should try being vulnerable for once. Talk about your insecurities, what’s important to you, your values etc. 

Small Talk. I don’t know about you guys, but I personally feel small talk is so uncomfortable because everything is so superficial. Both sides are using trying to be friendly, pretending and trying to conceal something. If you’re good at this, then good for you, but for some people, this is really a turn off. Unless you’re an easy going person then maybe this doesn’t really apply to you. 

Being Too Serious. Opposite of using humor or sarcasm inappropriately is when you can’t keep the conversation light hearted. There are times when it’s really uncomfortable talking about serious or personal issues and it’s better to add a little humor to lighten the air. You have to be dynamic. 

Being Paranoid. This is when you assume that the other person has ill-intention and you become very biased in processing everything they say. For example, you hear from a friend that this person is not a good person and when you talk to them, you are already trying to look for those faults. Maybe there’s some truth in your friend’s warning, but if you never met this person, keep a benefit of doubt first. 

Source: here.

Nurture Good Mental Health

As you are growing by time, you will somehow collect all the good values from people you have met or even you are getting with right now. Those people with good quality of characteristics influence you more or less and create you into a better person. Below are 10 signs that you have a good mental health. I got all the references from my reading through months a year back then. So, I just try to sum it up.

1. Feeling good about yourself, accepting that we have both strength and weaknesses. Thus, we need to understand that change takes time and is a process.
2. Being able to manage your emotions so that you don't feel overwhelmed or controlled by feelings of anxiety, fear, anger, hatred, love, jealousy, etc. If someone talks crappy things to you, you are not easily hooked, just leave the conversation, change the topic and you are saved.
3. Being able to form and enjoy stable, lasting and satisfying relationships.
4. Feeling comfortable, and at ease, around other people. 
5. Not taking life too seriously, being able to laugh at yourself and others.
6. Respecting yourself, your beliefs, values, viewpoints, choices, decisions, and actions. Not enough, you need to respect others and their right to think, choose, decide and act for themselves. 
7. Being able to accept and cope with life's disappointments. 
8. Being able to cope with life's demands, and effectively manage the problem we encounter.
9. Being able to think for yourself, and to arrive at your own decisions. 
10. Being able to influence and shape the world around us. So our contributions makes a positive difference. Also, being able to adapt and compromise when this is healthy and appropriate. 

Hope it is useful. I also get a lot of things to learn.

Overcome Your Fear of Social Situations

Hi,

In certain ways, I have a fear of particular social situations that I better pull my blanket up and stay there. However, I said it to myself that it is not good at all to my self (regardless it is introverted or not). These are what I do to overcome my fear of social situations.

Force myself to go out at least once or twice a week. I did it. I go to campus and that's enough. It is just to help me to cope with my anxiety, ask a friend to do something with you, or go to an event where I know few people but not too crowded. The idea is to gradually stretch myself so that, eventually, I will be able to go to new things, and not feel terrified of meeting people I have never met before.

Pay attention to my appearance. When we feel good or at least comfortable with the way we look, we feel less anxious and more confident.

Find out what other people talking about such as popular movies, TV series, TV shows, sports, etc and read up on them. For example, you could google for the latest scores, headlines news and gossip on the stars.

When I am at social events watch to see how other people behave. I can learn a lot from closely observing, listening to, and then copying others.

So far, these all I can possibly do to cope with my fear of social situations. If you feel you can't cope with it, find a counselor to address the underlying fears that are behind your social anxiety. It is not a sin. It is good for your personal development :)

What Should You Never Say To Women?

Ha! I got a lot of references from real life yelpers (yes, women!) about this topic. Boys, I found that these statements or questions are prohibited to be hurled to any woman that you chase/like/love/havesexwith. Okay, let me reduce the scope, I talk about the man-woman relationship, not because I am against to gay relationship but I simply do not know how gay relationship works. Pardon. If it goes similar with the things I am talking about below then you may take it as an input.

1. Don't tell women that she can't drive. It means you generalise it that she's included to the bad drivers
She will suddenly have an urge to slap you because simply for several women, they aren't. Plenty of men are terrible drivers and plenty of women are terrible drivers. If most of the women in your life are bad drivers, it is just a really bad example to deal with and don't generalise it to all women you know, especially your loved one ;)

2. Never imply a woman that she is fat!
Even if she IS fat. Don't do it. In any circumstances. It is never okay because women internalise that kind of thing much more than a man will, so if you call her fat, she will remember it for the rest of her life, when she looks herself on the mirror. It will wreck self-esteem because women are taught that being fat is basically the worst thing they can ever be. Maybe they are too sensitive. Maybe they are too much but it is not an excuse for you to be a disrespectful tool. If you want to tease her, find another way. If she really is fat, get a life and find something more worthwhile to talk about. If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all. Okay, Bambi?

3. Don't talk about the women from your past, and especially don't compare your current lady to them
If you find yourself getting ready to break this rule, clamp your mouth shut before it's too late. She will have a very bad day. No woman wants to hear it, even if it's compliment. If any of these statements are part of your normal conversation, drop them immediately:
I've been with a lot of women.
You're hotter than the last girl I dated.
I'm a total stud.
Don't worry. I've been with bigger women than you.

Dear, save that kind of talk for your buddies because ladies definitely have no interest in your conquest.

4. Don't compare your lady to your mother. 
Because.. women tend to have a complicated relationship with their mother-in-law. Second, she may hate your mother but has not told you to spare your feelings. Even if she IS the spitting image of your mommy dearest, never say so. Keep it for yourself. Like forever.

5. Don't talk about how hot/pretty/sexy another woman is.
The girl you're with is the hottest, sexiest person alive on the face of the earth. Okay, so she's obviously not, but she WANTS to feel like you hold her above other women. Even if it's someone completely harmless, like Angelina Jolie, I promise you that your girl doesn't want to hear it.

It will make her insecure. It will make her jealous. Do you really want to have to deal with the behavior that stems from that? No, he?

6. Don't tell her to do anything. 
Ask her like a decent human being. When you act like women are just put on the earth to bring you things and sleep with you, you make her think you're an abusive misogynist who uses aggressive and controlling behavior to distract from the fact that you have a tiny penis.

Be a man. If you want a beer, use your legs and get it yourself. If you want a sandwich, get your butt off of the couch and head to the kitchen. If you really want her to make one for you because she has much better culinary skills, ask her nicely :) She will do it anything for you if you ask nicely, not like she's more inferior than you or simply you just married a maid.

Otherwise, you never deserve to get laid again.

7. Don't call her by someone else's name.
Hahaha. You should know better than this by now. Women like to feel special, and one way to let them know that they mean a lot to you is to call them by their name. It's an easy way to show that you care. It implies that you just know each other for months. If you've been together with your lady like for years and you still get her name wrong, you have serious issue, dude.

But on the flip side, calling her by the wrong name will show you that you care less and you're confusing her for someone else. Not cool! Learn her name and use it correctly. Don't confuse it with your ex(es) or other women, she will say bye bye.

8. If you haven't met her in person, don't ask her to send dirty pictures to you.
In this day and age, far too many men think it's reasonable to request nude pictures prior to a first date. Heck (bloody hell), guys on the internet think it's okay to do this before you've even met in real life.

No, it's not okay. It's incredibly far from okay, actually.

Women have no interest in seeing a picture of your penis before she meets you in person. It's not sexy. Save it for later. Like, you know when you actually know each other.

Voila! Those are the things that women hate to hear from a man she loves/chases/likes. Hope it's useful and don't ruin your relationships with tiny little things.