What a thoughtful gift

He ordered a customised satin scarf from his closest artist best friend. It is one from one, means that it was designed upon his request only for me. He came up with helix nebula, my favourite interstellar galactic dust as a theme. The scarf is too beautiful for me. 

What a very thoughtful gift a man can give for his love. Thank you much for giving this gorgeous scarf as my graduation gift. This is too sweet :) 

I love you to the moon and back, Yonas. I always pray for your happiness as well. 

Special thanks to Citra as the artist for MTR PTR. If you're interested to order customised scarf with premium quality, you may contact her directly at +62 818 788 297 (Indonesia). 

My Ways to Have a Good Day!

As you may have been aware of that I am one of those introvert people alive in this extrovert life. I have my own deals to make myself feel better from tiredness or boredom. And I am sure that you have other ways to make yourself feel better through the rollercoaster life. Below are what I usually do recently to simply think that everything is just superfine. 

1. Make a playlist of all my favorite songs, old ones I may have totally forgotten but bring back good memories.
2. Take a walk outside. I find I only start to feel worse and wallow if I let myself melt into my bed and engage in the bad feelings. 
3. Organise my drawers or closet. It feels good to be productive when you feel like a worthless idiot on the inside. You can look at your clean clothes and feel like a human again.
4. Eat something decadent. Make an ice cream sundae or so. Eat something pretty! Cupcakes, anything!
5. Go through your phone and delete anyone you no longer talk to or anyone who sucks and makes your life worse.
6. Draw. I have a stack of paper and some colored oil paintings for just such an occasion. It's relaxing and fun.
7. Call my boyfriend, chat with him, laugh with him, meet him! And simply he said that he loves me just make my day.
8. Get some tattoos. I plan to have one after I graduate this May :P 
9. Re-read your favourite book. Highlight the passages that make I love it so much so I'll never forget them.
10. Start watching some quality shows/programming to remind yourself life is worth living and people still make good stuff.
11. Read everything you can find about your favourite things (fashion, sports, music, etc). 
12. Being around cuties and fluffiest animal (I choose dogs for some reasons) will brighten my mood.
13. Write my friends a really nice email. Just an out-of-the-blue "thanks for being so great!" email.
14. Express my love to my boyfriend by saying sweet things and make him feel so loved. 
15. Do some yoga poses :P and breathe slowly.
16. Go on Youtube and watch all the "fail" videos. Being you isn't so bad. Funny though.
17. Futz around with your hair. Add some color or see what it would look like curly or in a beehive.
18. Do your make up and dress nicely. 
19. Eat fruit. Fruit has sugars that can lift my mood. Pineapple and blueberries? Make a smoothie.
20. Write in my journal, go back and read old entries. Remembered all that stuff I cared about. 
21. Smile. Even if you don't feel like it, fake it, sometimes moving the muscles in our face activates chemicals in our brains to lift our moods. Smiling when you don't want to can actually help you feel better.
22. Do your hobbies. Mine are dealing with handicraft, playing piano, reading some good books!

Good day, all.

Learning from Yoda

I got to say I am pretty excited about the news of new Star Wars movies and so for the past few weeks I found one quote from Yoda that I got it from positivity blog belongs to Henrik:

Do or do not.. there is no try..

It is a helpful reminder because when you tell yourself and or someone else that you will try, you are in an experience more likely to give up or just stop when the first obstacle shows up.

When the inevitable obstacles that always show up start to block your path, you will say this. I will try.

However, smooth sailing with no problems at all is pretty rare. By making a clear choices to do or not do something, and putting power behind those choices, you are more likely to actually get things done and succeed.

What you have to do is only following through. My personal tip is..

Tell your loved ones or best friends that you will do something. This can light a fire under you and help you to put more power and commitment into following through. But, don't do it in Facebook crowd. I don't know maybe I am just that introvert, I don't dare to put my personal life on Facebook.

I always put it in my personal journal dan I always check regularly and of course, review each week (even each day in my case). Spending a few minutes reviewing how my week has gone and what actions I have taken is something that has helped me to feel more accountable to myself and my plans lately. Oh I feel in heaven when put a "check" mark on my goals.

And somehow it is getting me to be more motivated.

I hope it works on you as it really works on me.

Go find a happy life!

February Full of Love

These are new bracelets I made minutes ago. I put crescent moon charm as a symbol of "to grow" in Latin and made it another with the letter of "Love" because it is simply made with full happiness and love.

Thank you for my friends who bought it. I wish you happiness wearing it :)

                                                                                                                  

Healing Bracelets: Acacia

It's been months I am falling in love with handmade bracelets. I am thinking new design and searching for particular shop to get the materials and finally I found the shop in Singapore who provide everything's related to beads. 

This is my latest handmade healing bracelet, call her Acacia. I name it that way because I want people who wear it feel calm and healed from all of their troubles. I put the "Tree of Life" charm as a symbol of love, wisdom, rebirth, strength, redemption, friendship, and encouragement. 

Hope you guys like it as I really do love making it. 

Apparently Called Love

long live all the mountains we moved, I had the time in my life fighting dragons with you.

Good Start in 2013

Hi everyone,

I hope your 2013 is off to a very good start. What I want to cover today is about self-kindness. It is very close to my heart because it means a lot for me. By being kinder towards myself I have become happier, more effective and motivated and it has helped me to become kinder and better in my relationships with others.

People prone to feel no good about themselves, if you think that your self-esteem is a bit low or you beat yourself up regularly when making a mistake then you still have a chance to not to do so.

There are certain habits that you can follow within yourself to become more self-reliant and stronger through life's ups and downs.

Change your input to the things that are kind and constructive. 

Destructive messages from the people around you or from media, advertising and society does not help you to be kind to yourself. For example, you are not accepting yourself as a sexy tanned girl because you believe white represents beauty or maybe you think that "fat" is somehow a crime because being skinny is gorgeous, men like it. Wrong, period.

You can change your habit by focusing on relationships to our friends or others. It could be encouragement to your friends and family or helping someone close who has been in a misfortune situation. It could be a practical development books and blog-walking that help you out with real solutions to the challenges you face and goals to achieve. You may learn a lot from others. There are so many kind people out there. It also could be spending more time in nature and in silence to relax and recharge yourself.

Give yourself a break.

Sometimes we always want to be win towards everything. That may sound inspirational yet so Spartan in theory. But reality is not ideal or perfect and neither are you and I. Life gets in the way sometimes. You may get in your way and sometimes you simply don't have the energy to do something.

It's okay.

Instead of trying to live up to some perfect image that other people may press upon you, choose to set human standards for yourself. Gods' works are theirs, we have our own.

Choose to give yourself a break when things don't go as you may have wished and choose to cut yourself some slack. Instead of beating yourself mercilessly.

At least these two points help me the most. I hope they will do it on you.

Cheers!

Serendipity

It begins with a good laugh.

You Were Kinda Cute, 2012

2012 went by entirely too quickly. I know it's already January 7, but I am just connected with a speedy internet connection to spill everything out of my mind.

2012, I have explored. I went out. I don't hate to be introvert but getting a life is cooler rather than praising my ego. So, let us see what happened for the past year.

My loveliest Grandma passed away and it still left a huge hole in my heart. I got a scholarship and started my master degree in Singapore, which is absolutely nuts on so many levels. Never did I think I'd make it this far but I made it in first semester *yay.

I made up for all the good decisions I spent many years making and finally let it go. I slowly but surely became that girl who has been miserable. Hard. I forgot how excruciatingly terrible those feelings can feel. I can't imagine being treated that way for even a few seconds longer after 2011. I moved on.

I turned to be 25. I made some really startling decisions about life and am quite likely NOT to regret them days after. I was more positive and I like it. I learnt how to let go and made mistakes and stopped thinking so damn much. I learnt how to relax. I stopped stressing and caring about the things that don't matter.

I devoted more time to myself, my friends, my family and my hobbies. I worked my ass off a little more than usual when it comes to school.

I moved on and breathe. I am much, much, much better me.

Lots of job opportunities. Rock on my GPA. I grew up a lot. I met many new friends. I conquered one of my hardest semester. I stumbled through a few awkward dates.

Feel less weighed down, undoubtedly solved some of the problems. I feel as if I am in a kind of renaissance through the next cycle.

It ended up with a good thing. I finally met someone in the end of this year. I am happy. This past months really allowed us to bond immensely. So thankful for great friends, family, and these 2012 moments.

I still have a whole lot of people to meet. I have lots of places to go. I have many things to be and things to do.

I surely spend my a half of year to finish my graduate school. We will see what life offers me for another six months. My next goals are to sharpen my skills because it is always a good thing when we are expert on something. Perseverance, to achieve my life goals, and last but not least to balance my professional life and personal dreams with him.

Live light and be light :)

Gratitude

It is almost the end of this year 2012. Nothing I want to say but words full of gratitude for being happy and strong.

I remarkably survive from 2011's nightmares. I showed it to the world this year.

Happiness is an attitude :)

Conversation With God

"Thank You for being with me, for talking to me about my heart. I haven't really talked about that with anyone. It just felt so terrifying. It doesn't seem to hold the same power now," Ivy prayed.

"The darkness hides the true size of fears and lies and regrets," Jesus explained. "The truth is they are more shadow than reality, so they seem bigger in the dark. When the light shines into the places where they live inside you, you start to see them for what they are."

"But why do we keep all that crap inside?" Ivy asked.

"Because we believe it's safer there. And, sometimes, when you're kid trying to survive, it really is safer there. Then you grow up on the outside, but on the inside you're still that kid in the dark cave surrounded by monsters and out of habit you keep adding to your collection.

Collecting tears. Collecting sadness," Jesus replied.

"Remember, you can't do it alone. Some folks try with all kinds of coping mental games. But the monsters are still there, just waiting for the chance to come out."

"So, what do I do now?" asked Ivy.

"What you're already doing, learning to live loved. It's not an easy concept. You have a hard time sharing anything so far." He chuckled and continued, "So, yes, our friendship is real, Ivy. Not merely imagine. We're meant to experience this life, your life, together, in a dialogue, sharing the journey. You get to share in our wisdom and learn to love with our love, and we get... to hear your grumble and gripe and complain and...."

Ivy laughed out loud and pushed Jesus sideways in her prayer.

Ivy didn't know whether to laugh or cry. She realised how much she had come to love this man, this man who was also God.

"Don't think we didn't try. Have you noticed that in your pain you assume the worst of me? I've been talking to you for a long time, but today was the first you could hear it. I am more than happy to see you happy. You don't need to have it all figured out. Just be with Me."

It Was Gone

As Ivy made her way down near the lake, she suddenly realised that something was missing. Her constant companion, her sadness, was gone. It was as if it had been washed away in the mists of the rain. Its absence felt odd, perhaps even uncomfortable. For the past years it had defined for her what was normal, but now, unexpectedly, it had vanished. It feels good.

Normal is a myth.

The sadness would not be the part of her identity any longer.

With each sob she felt the tension drain away, replaced by a deep sense of relief. Finally, she took a deep breath and blew it out as she lifted her head and smiled.

Oh Dear Ivy

Ivy was not sure about a lot of things, but at some time in her heart and mind during the days following her tiff with the icy driveway, she became convinced that there were three plausible explanations for this condition. It was either from God, an absurd as that sounded; a cruel joke; or something more sinister from heartless people. Regardless, the pain dominated her thoughts every waking minute and her dreams at night.

Secretly, she began to make plans to travel to other hut the following months, year. At first she told no one, not even her parents. She had no reasonable defense in any exchange that would result after such a disclosure, and she was afraid that she might get locked up and the key thrown away. Anyway, she rationalised such a conversation would only bring more pain with no resolution. "I am keeping it to myself for the sake of everyone's happiness," she told herself. Besides, acknowledging the pain would mean admitting that she had kept secrets from her, secrets she still justified in her own mind, her pain. Sometimes honesty can be incredibly messy.

Convinced the rightness of her impeding journey, she began to open her heart again. She has been toying with the idea of becoming less painful again. So, she found this musical box in her journey of pain. That was not the thing she had anticipated, and she gave it a quizzical look. She thinks it is a great idea, but at first, she thinks she can survive alone for a couple more years, despite she has a lot to do anyway. She shrugged it off, perhaps grateful the path for her to find the musical box. She can throw anything in it while the musical box always gives her its favorite songs. She is not alone anymore.

And the story may begin.

Fits In

There are times when you choose to believe something that would normally be considered absolutely irrational. It doesn't mean that it is actually irrational, but it surely is not rational. Perhaps, there is suprarationality, a reason beyond the normal definitions of fact or data-based logic, something that makes sense if you can see a bigger picture of reality.

Maybe that is where the faith fits in.

Merry Christmas. Peace be with you.

Blessed

Blessed are those who can give without remembering and who can take without forgetting.

Good Wish :)

This is my wish for you: Comfort on difficult days, smiles when sadness intrudes, rainbows to follow the clouds, laughter to kiss your lips, sunsets to warm your heart, hugs when spirits sag, beauty for your eyes to see, friendships to brighten your being, faith so that you can believe, confidence for when you doubt, courage to know yourself, patience to accept the truth, Love to complete your life.

- Unknown

Stress Less

1. Laugh and dance it out
2. Go for a walk
3. Talk about it
4. Breathe
5. Go to bed earlier
6. Focus on what you can control
7. Reminisce about good times
8. Ask for a hug
9. Look for opportunities in life's challenges
10. Smile

I am glad I can sleep well for the past days, I know for sure time heals :)

Last Potluck

Last Potluck (before I move to Sg)

Research and Resource Team

IndoPacific Edelman

July 6, 2012

Life As An Introvert: Be Courageous

Last weekend, I met someone who happens to be my best friend, he gave me a psychological test (which I knew/realised in the end, damn you) and it came to a point that I described my future with nothing but pure white, loneliness, and one straight footpath.

I realise that it is must be related to my move to Singapore for good. We talked a lot and I had a good time hearing his explanation, basically what he said was all makes sense. Well people, you know you can treat me well by giving me something that I can take it logically. So, what I can sum up from his interpretation on my life is, I need courage to make that pure white go colourful.

Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear - Meg Cabot

Hi friends,

I know I am scared right now, I do not have any idea what will happen next but I have prepared what I have to do right now to face the blank future :)

Focus on what I am doing right now
It is a mistake to look too far ahead. Only one link in the chain of destiny can be handled at a time. However, it is always wise to look ahead, but difficult to look further than you can see.


It is always hard to foresee the future, too many considerations and sometimes the project can seem close to impossible. It leads us to become overwhelmed and feel aimlessly instead.

I know I have to go back from future to present moment, back to today, back to now!

What I need is just to focus the first step today, nothing else. Kate, be strong, what you need is just another step forward and another step forward, don't think too far. I should put myself in a state that I can become more positive, open, and enthusiastic about what life will offer ahead.

Be an optimist 
Attitude is a little thing that makes a big difference.


What I learn a lot from my past experiences is I should focus on what makes me happy and happier; and help me making huge difference compared to focus on what is wrong in every situation and or what makes me more of a victim. Nah.

What I usually do in the morning is, I pray, I give thank to the Almighty God that I can wake up this morning, I can feel the good day ahead, and I say thanks again for several times. I fill my mind and emotional system with positive input from people, I say good morning to my parents, sisters, and best friends, I play the calming music, or read one or two chapters of a very good book. I say hi to several friends because I believe their happy thoughts have a big influence and it is contagious. I limit my time with negative people. I keep my positive attitude up to the limit.

I practice it in my real life that there is no problem bigger than my faith.

Be persistent. I don't give up.
Continuous effort - not strength or intelligence - is the key to unlocking our potential. And if you're going through hell, keep going.


Society tells us to look for quick fixes and it is easier to give up so soon. After we have failed several times, we feel like Geez, what the hell is going on with me, I give up on this. Don't. I have failed several times and I have been going through something like it's never ending stories. I learn a lot from failures. Thus, I don't give up too early, we are not a baby, we have brain and mind that have reasonable time-frame for success, it might be not realistic but it is possible. Thus, I should tell you that we should never quit. It is also wise to keep going on our current path a little bit longer.

Try and try again.

It is immensely helping to know what you really want, really, really, really want. We can find inner motivation to build inner strength like persistence.

Most troubles never happen!
When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened.


Most things we fear will happen never happen. They are just zombies/monsters in our own mind and if they happen then they will most often not be as painful or bad as we expected.

Worrying is most often just a waste of time.

Maybe you may think back and remind yourself of how little of what you feared throughout your life that has actually happened, you can start to release more and more worry from your own thoughts.

Freedom lies in being bold - Robert Frost

So,  that's a wrap. Those are several points that I will do currently.

Well people,
I wish you all could start your day and future plan by doing something what you really want in this life.
I wish you all could move through your day to day life with a feeling of much lighter, happier, and more optimistic attitude.

God bless you, All.

PS: If a concept of God is too absurd for you, take another term that might you think that way. Universe will do.

Farewell Parties

These is a glimpse of my farewell parties pictures before I move to Singapore for good. I took it in the past month as a remembrance that I always have so many greatest friends in Indonesia.

For more pictures of my farewell parties, do click here.